I'm a Total Loser Because...

March 22, 2015
Why do haters be haters ,why don't they just go yell at a banana or something?anyways my life sucks my be won't even answer me anymore iam I clinny,annoying or is he board of me...I probably think about killing myself 9-10 times a day no wait hourly
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March 22, 2015

I have tried. I really have. I am 34. I am fat now. My teeth are falling out. I am tired.  And my body hurts. And my heart is breaking.  I used to be skinny and strong. I used to cling to the the thought I was speacial and smart. It's time I let that

 Go. I have worked hard. Suffered to make things easier on others. Cared for those who were sad, even though it was for less than what I have been through. My husband hates me.......he always cuts me down. Tells me how I am wrong,  bad, un trustworthy. I have never done really done any thing wrong......I cook. I clean,  I work. I listen.  I dig trenches. Clean up poop. Vomit. I listen to his woe. I take care of the kids. I find my own rides. I haul trash. I stay at home. I am alone. Whatever is àsked of me I do. Wether I am sick, tired, sad I do what I have to do. But everyone treats me as a lesser being. I must be lacking something I don't know  I want to die. No one one cares. I am a loser. I need to accept that. 

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March 18, 2015

Hi, My name is unimportant as my whole life is.  I am 27 years old living with my parents never had a girlfriend and never had a true friend. I always ran from everything, school, work, always coming back to my room and my computer which i spent most of my time at, about 16 hours plus/minus a day. Even after getting mad at myslef deleting everything which consumes my time i always coming back and restoring everything back. Im too scared to finish this life, which i had tried. I wish i wouldnt been born at all but it seems i must suffer more than i want.

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  1. LexLoser LexLoser thinks you're a loser
  2. LexLoser LexLoser said: In the same boat my friend

March 15, 2015

When one tries to describe themselves, it's very hard to find a place to begin.  So let's start from the beginning.  I'm the youngest of 3 boys born in a small midwest town.  My dad was a farmer for the first 3 years of my life, but times got tough and he had to sell the farm and moved us all into town.  He bought a semi-truck and became a coast-to-coast/border-to-border trucker.  I didn't see him much growing up.  My oldest brother is 6 years older than me and was the trouble maker and rebel.  My middle brother, we found out later, suffered from Aspergers and was a total social outcast at school.  And I was the youngest, different from both of them.  I have red hair, they're blonds, I'm a lefty, they're both right-handed... I've always felt kind of like a cross between the two growing up, in a sense.  Anyways, with older brothers like that, I never really learned what a normal childhood was like... I didn't have anyone to look up to, certainly not those two.  My mom worked in a factory and we were essentially latch-key kids.  I can't begin to tell you the hours and hours I spent in front of the TV.  Don't get me wrong, when I was younger, I did have friends and we'd do things and spent lots of time together... but as I got older, I started pretending I wasn't home when they came over, or I'd never answer the phone, or I'd make excuses why I didn't want to do this or that...  High school came around and I realized I was kind of like a chameleon.  I hung with the jocks, burn-outs, nerds, rich, poor...  I never really fit into one group wholeheartedly.  Then girls started to come into the picture.  I never really felt particularly attracted one way or the other to either sex, it just was.  I didn't pursue girls or wasn't the overly hormone fueled teenager.  They asked me out and I'd go along with it.  I did have one steady girlfriend on-and-off in HS, each time after a break-up, she'd ask me back eventually.  One thing I always regret is the countless times I've had chances to do stuff with girls back then, but I never did.  I never kissed a girl until I was in the Navy, and that's a whole nother story.  So I skated through school, straight C student.  The only things I ever did like in HS was finding someone to buy beer for me, and I did have beer drinking buddies I'd hang around with. 


So I graduate HS and made no effort to even look into college because I didn't know what the hell I wanted to be, so I took the easy way out of cowtown as fast as I could and joined the Navy... This little bird was going to fly (or in this case float).  Boot camp was boot camp, I had an infection in my leg that kept me away from the physical aspect of boot camp, I actually gained weight, while others my size lost 30+ pounds (I'm a little chunky, but not obese).  So I get stationed in San Diego and discover the trolley to Tijuana.  What does an 18 year old virgin do in Tijuana you ask?  He loses it to a hooker.  Yep, my first sexual experience was with a Tijuana hooker.  Luckily I got to use the condom before my buddy had to wash it out and use it.  Anyways, life on base was alright, we could drink at the bars on base if we weren't 21, so I got my Navy friends to go drinking with and raise hell with... but it was never about looking for woman.  Maybe for them, they tried, but I seemed disinterested.  There was one Mexican gal who liked hanging out at Navy bars and she picked me up and became a 'couple' if you will for a few months.  She was crazy about me and wanted to marry and all that stuff... but she was 36 and I was 19, she had 3 kids and it just wasn't going to be my thing.  So that was the end of that and I spent the next few years in the Navy seeing the world through some of the best bar windows on the planet.  I guess I really liked to drink in my younger days.


So after the Navy, I move back to the midwest and move in with my parents.  Oh, did I mention, my dad became a pastor when I was in high school.  He saw the light and went to seminary school during the beginning of my teen years.  Sure, he quit trucking, but he still wasn't around because his school was so far away.  Trucker's kid to Preacher's kid, but I digress...  SO I move in with my parents and now my dad's a pastor of a small church in Wisconsin.  I lived there for a bit and decided to strike out...  I moved to a college town with the intention of looking into the school and using my GI Bill... I wound up moving into a college party house instead and worked.  A college party house you say, there must've been a lot of tail... sure, but none interested in me.  Never got lucky there once, and I was a goddammed navy veteren co-mingling with all these farm girls away from home for the first time.  I think I realized then, it's not that I"m not interested, it's that I got no game, or I'm incredibly stupid and missing signals... but either way, I left town without any fanfare and moved to help my uncle in his bakery.  There I met a gal that I really, kind of dug.  There was something different about her and I really liked her.  But when I met her, she was already engaged to her HS boyfriend... and she got pregnant.  I know it wasn't mine because... you guessed it, we never had sex.  But I felt like she was the one that got away, I wasn't going to raise some other dude's kid, not at that time of my life.  So I left that town.


I eventually started college.  A 25 year old freshman.  By this time, most of my contemporaries were already getting married and having kids, starting careers and buying houses and toys... but I'll just be the 25 year old college freshman still going to keggers and skating through school on my GI bill, and student  loans.  You'd think it would be easy for a well travelled guy like me to find my way into a circle or two.  I did.  Started hanging with a group of guys who liked to get stoned and golf and hit the bars or whatnot...  That was cool, but I was still the outsider, still older, still weirdish.  But I did meet a girl and we hung out a lot and started doing stuff then going out.  We were on and off for a few years, but I felt she was my last gasp because I'll be graduating college soon and will have to enter the workforce, this is the time I'm supposed to get married and start a family... right?  Well I graduated and started working and eventually moved near where my college girl lived.  I found my way back into her life eventually and we got married.  I was married for 8 years which produced no kids.  We got divorced because of something self destructive I did.  Remember that girl I met at my uncle's bakery?  Well, you can thank facebook for helping destroy my marriage, that and my own bad decisions of course. 


So I get kicked out, we sell the house, her family hates me now, I lost the few friends we had, and long story short... I'm now a 44 year old divorced guy with no kids living in a one-bedroom apartment, working a menial job, has no social life, no prospects, not part of any clubs or organizations. It's been over two years since I had any physical contact with anyone.  My parents and my now drug dealing brother are my only familial ties, and once my parents pass, I don't know if there's really any reason for me to be around... no one asks me to do anything.  But maybe that's because I spent so many years ignoring phone calls and messages and distancing myself from everyone.

Intersting thing, someone posted a picture of my third grade class for my recent reunion.  I noticed something about it that made some things clear.  I was smack dab right in the middle of the picture, surrounded by my class.  But I was crouched, with my arms inward, like I was trying to avoid touching the people next to me... I wonder if I've always been like that... It makes sense.


Anyways, this is turning into a wall of text and I'm just going to stop right here.  There's obviously more and more layers to me but I won't get into that now... I'm getting sidetracked.

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March 8, 2015

Im posting after grow up.  It is not as easy as you think, to transform from being a loser.  Im over 30 years old and still feel like a loser.  But its not because of what I do exactly.  Its because as an adult I feel the pressure of such an isolated life.  i have two small children whom are complete slobs!  I ve tried every tried everything I know to get them to pick their things up, i spends hours just going through the house everyday just picking up my boyfriends clothes and my childrens things and making all the meals and getting them to all their activities all the while being in a relationship with a person I grow to resent more and more everyday.  I would say my relationship is physically, emotionally and verbally abusive.  I usually fight back and somewhat beat him at his own game.  But it doesnt get over the embarrassment of being a failure to my family.....i dont have any friends.  When I was a kid we moved alot and I was always popular for a month and then I just became a super target by every popular person.....I mean there was no chance I could work my way up on the social ladder once that happened.  Im I guess what you call a popular loser.  Im expected to shit gold and when i dont meet family or vriends expectations they talk shit or just stop emotionally supporting me.  I cry alot.  I cry as i write this.  Ive gone to a therpist for issues i had with my father....and my therapist told me to get as far away from him as soon as I could, and that though I lived with my mother u til I was 17 (i got decent grades and got out early) as soon as I moved to Los Angeles my family really sort of changed.  I bot the shit end of the stick in life.  I hVe amajor dark cloud that hangs around me.  I needed a lawyer for somethi g once and the lawyer went so far as to say I'm cursed and that I should go to church.  I dont believe I need to prey to god.  I need my family to respect me.  And unfortunately I guess what makes me a loser is  I dont know how to speak up for myself and I ve picked people that have turned i to situations in my life and those situations just dig my loser hole more.  My boyfriend of 5 years is an alcoholic, he has actually gone through pancreatitis 3 times in the last 2 years.  My life is so so hard and when i look at everyone else i just feel so different.  I just assume they must be able to hide it well or at best they are happy.  Ive never been happy.  I found this site and i feel likethere is some common bond, that maybe this isnt our fault that we are losers but that we are so kind and forgiving that people emotionally abuse us by lying to us in all kinds of different ways.  There is no therapist or magic pill that is going to fix us.  I decided to write to you all because as I bet older i really have come to terms with how shitty my life is.  The only thing I would feel bad about would be that i brought two children into this world and then i left them to fend for themselves.  Its hard for me to find an excuse or reason for doing that to them.....but i just do t know how to end the bad relationships i have with my family and my loser boyfriend.  Heas just such a fucking loser.....he practically disgusts me.  Hes even goodlooking and he is just a lazy and vengeful person.  He probably has mental issues like ocd or add.   

Why im writing on here....I wouldnt want to see any of you end up so over life.  Im just a zombie trapped in a body.  Im so unfulfilled in life.  I think the big key that i can share is you have to learn to walk away from the people that are treating you horribly.  I know I was alot more confident when I graduated from high school and moved out of my parents home.  I started to go to school, but I was in Los Angeles and te commute to school was 2 hour each way, my parents failed to help me purchase a car.  i believe going to college is a really good step for the people reading this.  Even if it is just a few classes.  The thing that no one wants to tell you is, your twenties are the best timea of your life....get as far ahaead in your twenties as you can.  Get a job, employers are more willing to hire a you d person than an old person with no education.  Its the sad truth.  That is why unemployment is bad, no one wants to hire a 35 year old who doesnt have experience or college.  I suggest staying out of relTionships u til your thirty.  Another myth, no one wants to be the one that nabbed te sleaze, because a sleaze will still walk talk and act ?ike a sleaze.  I got the buy who was the popular sleaze and all he does is telling me how fat i am or how he could get anyone in a minute....i could too, but i got kids....life isnt about sex, it really should be about money. I !ove money....love love love money. But i really want my own money....piles of it.  I want to help people...lots of people, but alas i cant be the activist and then become rich....it just doesnt work that way. Maybe I want it because everything else in my life is so in flux. Money is concrete ya know.  Dont have kids ever,  really, if you can help it.  Not unless you are really happy in life, it thi k we can all agree it is not fu. To feel so alone, especially when we all have people in our lives.  Not until your life is somewhat tbe way you want it to be and you feel happy because ygou have a car and a home and a great love and you are over the depression for years....dont have children!!!!  It will only make thi gs worse and make you feel more worthless....you feel like your life is in shambles....by about 5 years old childrens unhappiness begins to show that are the insight to future problems.....and those are problems you have to help a 5 year old with, that usually involves another childs parents treating your child poorly or vice versa....dont get me wrong children are so sweet and cute but for me, i dont like most of my childs neighborhood parents and that causes alot of tension between the children, that they dont even know about.  So if you reply Ill try my best to write back....thanks for reading.  May you have a totally awesome day just being who you are!!!! And i will try to do the same, I promise!!!  Im going to go hang out on my inversion table.



  1. lyfsux lyfsux said: I have lots of things in my life that have to do with my family not respecting to even call me on the phone. Your not alone in this....I will be an older person you can comment to or with.

March 7, 2015

I feel like you guys are just moping around throwing pity parties, and trying to get attention. How about instead of trying to win the loser of the week trophy, you get the fuck off this site and go out and talk to a therapist about your problems. I mean you get what you give in life. I f you sit on your computer and talk about how you are nothing, then you are going to live to life doing/being nothing. Get up off your ass and go see the world, or talk to people, make goals and follow your dreams. Quite frankly no one feels bad about how shitty your life is because you have the oppurtunity to change it everyday. 

  1. TooScared TooScared thinks you're a loser
  2. darwinthwarted darwinthwarted said: Ditto to what Loserati wrote
  3. Neurotic Neurotic thinks you're a loser
  4. Loserati Loserati said: Wow, you are so right! Call the media, you've just solved depression and loneliness!!! No one has ever thought of that before! Venting on a website anonymously is definitely just a ploy to get "attention". Ignorance towards mental health breeds isolation.
  5. Samantha Samantha thinks you're a loser
  6. FAMILYFAIL738 FAMILYFAIL738 thinks you're a loser

March 7, 2015

Hey there! :)

My name is Raka, sounds foreign huh? Yes its because i'm from far east (Not the Chinese). As you know, eastern people are somewhat conservative and hypocrite. But, they tend to overly critizing and unfriendly to a person who smarter than them, a modern version of jelaousy.

I'm a guy and 18 this year, and have no "real" friends but i do have a lot of people who see me as a secondary friend. They come to me only if they want something from me. I felt so lonely even my parents forget about my last birthday in christmas.

Now im on college studying Information System, and every section on my campus filled by many group. The popular group on the cafetaria, the hippies on the park, the "bad" guys on the parking lot, the nerd basicaly on their class, the jocks on the stadium, and so on. I tried to be open minded by taking a chance to "entering" each group. I've been struggling to "survive" the highschool and now my college life is just same like my highschool life.

And today i decided to take my life alone, without any fake person besides me. Really. But if you guys (who read my post) wanted to know me or simply just want to have someone to talk, just follow me on twitter (@adnamhcarakar, thats my real account) or by Skype.


  1. Grow_Up Grow_Up thinks you're a loser

March 6, 2015

Herro dere c: 

Im a loser, yea but thats cool. Wanna hear my story? Well to bad cause' im going to tell it to you!

Oh look...a rhyme

Suffering with deep depression, I'm not very active. I like to stay indoors and be alone, i dont like people much. This has resulted in a lack of friends and social life. I usually only talk to people at school. Very rarely will you see me texting someone. Yes i do text people, but only around 3 people actually talk to me. Im also slightly chubby, which makes it even harder to make friends because in my school, no one wants to be friends with the chubby kid. 

Now, or, since i was around 4 i began gaming. Ive always been a gamer, which worsened my social life even more. When I was in 3rd grade, i started noticing my friends slipping away. Kid troubles right? Wrong! Me loosing my friends made my depression get a lot worse. I never really went outside, and I only did and still do when my best friend alexis are hanging out or when i have to go to the store with my mom. I do this usually everytime she goes out.

My mom, is the only basic remaning social life outside of school I have. It because of her that I still talk to people. Im confused though, people with huge egos, say to keep your "circle" small correct? When in reality they have many many people in their "circle". They dont know the true meaning of a small "circle" they dont know that "circles" like ours (if you have one) vary between few to no people. This misleads many people.

For once I'd like all those people to feel what it feels like to only have 3 or less friends. I'd also like to be more active, and skinnier, and i wish my hair was longer but theres nothing you can do about that stuff. I hope you guys enjoyed reading this as we waste our lives being loners together.

  1. Samantha Samantha said: OMFG this site is funny as fuck.
  2. adnamhcarakar adnamhcarakar thinks you're a loser
  3. TheNoone TheNoone said: I game to I know how you feel When a door closes a new one opens you just have to wait
  4. TheNoone TheNoone thinks you're a loser

March 6, 2015

Feeling stonewalled again. Not by outside forces, but by the usual lack of motivation and desire to avoid responsibility that fumes within me. 


At least the vestiges of depression have diminished. 


In this age of defined roles in life, I still float. I always have. Some days that sensation is more palpable than others. Today may be one of those days, as I still recover from my boss' shock that I do not own an iPhone, let alone have a smart phone or data plan. Forget for a moment that the expense of both a smart phone or data plan is too much for me. To him, it's inconceivable that anyone could operate without one. And in his accusations, I'm a lesser person without one. Perhaps he did not mean it that way, as he's know to speak before thinking. 


What it demonstrates to me more is the impenetrable wall of elitism and ageism. His wealth, his power produce a worldview that means he can't relate to the likes of me. I am sequestered in this out-of-synch environment where I toil in a shadow of his world. And only on those occasions when he gets a glimpse of me in that alcove does it genuinely shock him.


I suspect I'm that to most people. It's why I've forever existed on people's periphery, a good guy to know, but forgettable at best. 


I fail to distinguish myself in a world crowded with bodies yearning for a spotlight of identity and respect. To be the fat guy in the cafe, to be glanced-at once, dismissed, or worse, pitied. The world has their apps to control weight, their gyms to keep in shape, their nightclubs and parties for reverie, their motivations found in the pith of a poster over their desk, their social circle that makes attractive Instagram pictures for the rest of their cast of characters to ogle and to which to aspire. Where does a dough boy like me fit into this realm?


The tragedy of this is, for some inexplicable reason, my children are still fooled. They're young enough not to judge, the world still catering to them and insisting that love is all that matters. I wish I could shield them from the truth. In time, our kids'll dig deep enough to reveal Pandora's Box and release all the demons of doubt, shame, failure which ghost its confines. One day my children will realize the failure that is their father. 


I've joked that I will never be anyone's gold-digging target. I will also never be anyone's Instagram wallpost. I remember, recently, how someone took a pic with me, and then cropped me out before she posted it on Facebook. It stung. But perhaps the sting was worse because I expected she would do that. In her shoes, I would have done the same. I don't blame her for the move. In fact, I applaud it. I will remain forgettable. I am sexy, desirable, a go-getter only on the paper written by a master manipulator. It's that which causes the greater disappointment when met in person. 


What picture of me do you have in your mind from my words? I'll see your image, and raise you shocking disappointment. It is that which will be cratered to my tombstone. 


I would love to sit with the world's greatest philosophers throughout history and get them to analyze this. Because that perception/reality seems bullshit to me. Perceive as I may, that plate of salad will remain a salad, and not the puffy goodness of a doughnut or the warm homecoming of a fresh-from-the-oven sugar cookie.


Speaking of homecomings, my weekly castigation that is a visit to my mom's house went over as well as it normally does. This time, though, she overtly called me irresponsible. Well, I suppose she's correct. God knows, in her mind, she wonders how she could have produced such an ugly duckling, one without the benefit of ever turning into a swan, both physically and financially. That's because you adopted me, mother. You were bequeathed God's great living poster child of irony and disappointment. A garish flop. 

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  1. adnamhcarakar adnamhcarakar said: This is sooo deep =_="
  2. LonerLoser14 LonerLoser14 thinks you're a loser

March 5, 2015

 Well, right now my life just sucks. I live in the shadows and am invisible to everyone. It seems like I'm a back-up friend to everyone. Or like a secondary friend. Whenever someone fights with someone they go to me to talk bad about them or just vent to me for no reason at all. I always get caught up in other people's shit. The worst part about it is that after they are done being mad about someone, they go back to pretending that I'm invisible and are best friends with the person that they are mad it in the first place. I spend all of my time at home and never go anywhere. I spend atleast 5 hours a day wasting my life on the computer or playing some shit video game that will lead me to nowhere. No one is friends long enough to get to know me, and they wouldn't like knowing me because I'm just a lump on a couch and that is all I'll ever  be in life. I will never be successful in anything unless it is winning a stupid match in a video game. I'm just a fucking nerd. I can never do anything like football or basketball because I will get winded in less than five seconds. Overall, I feel like I'm just a waste of space. There should have been someone born that would be better than me. I'm just useless matter sitting doing nothing posting things like this on websites like this. I'm just bored of everything.


  1. Samantha Samantha thinks you're a loser
  2. killjoy killjoy said: Bro, I'll be your friend. I need more.