Damn, these shoes taste good!
I have a bad habit of speaking before any filter can get in the way to prevent me or slow me down.
Exhibit#1, from my college years:
Me: Hey, I haven't seen you in a week or so. Where have you been?
Buddy: Oh, I had to go home for a while. My dad has this trial going and I had to testify.
Me: Really? Awesome. ~trying to be funny~ So, who did he kill, anyway?
Buddy: ...
Me: ~noting awkward silence~
Buddy: ...well, they say he killed his secretary.
This is why I suck as a friend.
